The Morning Briefing: Weird—I Did Have ‘RFK Jr Brain Worm’ on My Bingo Card

Top O’ the Briefing

Happy Thursday, dear Kruiser Morning Briefing friends. Zaorynchyk was as surprised as anyone by the success of his handcrafted Ross Perot Pez dispensers. 


Before we get to today’s “news,” I wanted to point out that the KRUISERMB promo code for VIP subscriptions is now good for 50% off. At this price, you can afford to become part of our VIP Gold family and join me and Stephen Green for the “Five O’Clock Somewhere” Fourth Anniversary Extravaganza live chat on May 17. We’ll have Townhall Media luminaries like Ed Morrissey, Cam Edwards, Larry O’Connor, and our boss Paula Bolyard popping in to say hello. That’s just to name a few. The chat began during the early days of the pandemic. We were asked to do it for a few weeks until all of our curves had been flattened. It was such a good time that we just kept it rolling. 

It’s going to be a party. Stephen and I have reputations to keep on brand, after all. 

By now, most regular readers here are aware of how thrilled I am when anything outside of the ordinary presents itself in any given news cycle. Usually that means just a slight deviation from global wars, the southern border invasion, and the president who spends his day drooling on his Legos while he brings about the demise of the Republic. 

Every once in a great while, the universe obliges with something grand. 

We have all acknowledged that 2024 is already one of the weirdest presidential elections in modern times, and it’s only going to get weirder. A great example of that is the fact that there is a Kennedy running and the Democrats hate him. That would be the same party that gave Ted Kennedy a free pass after he left a staffer to drown, then went back to his hotel to have a cocktail and a shower before notified the police. He became known as “The Lion of the Senate” after that.


So, it’s a super tough gig if you’re the Kennedy who the party says “no” to. 

RFK Jr. has been a pain for the Democrats thus far, and his continued presence in the race as an independent seems to be a much bigger problem for Biden than for Trump. 

The dude also helps with the weird factor for 2024. This is from something that Matt wrote yesterday

The 2024 presidential election took an unusual turn on Wednesday when reports surfaced that independent presidential candidate Robert F. Kennedy Jr. once claimed in a deposition over a decade ago that doctors discovered that a parasitic worm had eaten part of his brain before dying inside his skull.

Look, there are a zillion things from RFK Jr.’s past that could be dredged up for hit piece fodder. The guy is a bit of an oddball, even for a Kennedy. This is probably one of the milder stories that anybody doing oppo research on him could find.

Also, I’d like to say that I wouldn’t be surprised to find parasitic worms coursing through the brains of most Democrats. It would explain a lot. 

Matt asked at the end of his post if anyone had this on their bingo card, and I couldn’t resist the snarky headline. We all need a bit of fun these days, don’t we? I am, however, never surprised at what this election cycle throws at us. I’ve been hoping for and expecting the bizarre. After this, I don’t feel that the time between now and election day will go all that slowly. 

There is only so much mileage that we can get out of brain worms. Tomorrow, I’m sure we’ll be back to lamenting the disintegration of freedom and sanity, then moving onto wondering what the President of the United States of America is doing when he stops and leans over in front of a camera like he did the other day. 


Don’t leave us hanging for too long, universe. 

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Everything Isn’t Awful

This was a request from Friend of the Briefing Ellen. 

SFK of the Day

WaPo Carries Water for Biden on Border Crisis, Spills Most of It

“This is a classic leftist ploy. They’ll pat themselves on the back for applying a tourniquet to a bleeding man whose leg they cut off in the first place.

Rampell’s contention that the GOP border crisis are ‘woefully out of date,’ blows up all over the place just when you realize that the relative comparison points she’s using are garbage.”

Shot of Vodka

Which Classic Comedy Character Is Biden Most Like? I Have the Answer

“But to the topic at hand, guys like Flounder and Stork took their oath to Delta House far more seriously than Bidenback  ever took his many oaths to the Constitution, and so I’d hate to sully their reputations by association with our so-called POTUS.”

PJ Media

Kevin and Kruiser. ‘Unwoke’ Free-for-All #70: FreedomWorks Is Latest Victim of the Never Trump Cancer

VodkaPundit. How About a Nice Slice of Censorship to Go With Your Inflation, Tax Hikes, and Global Wars?

RFK Jr. Revealed That a Parasitic Worm Ate Part of His Brain

Biden Surrogate: Ignore 20K+ Hamas Jihadis and Do ‘Diplomatic Solution’


VodkaPundit, Part Deux. You’ll Never Guess What Victorinox Is Removing from Its Iconic Swiss Army Knife

Chicago Mayor’s Attempt to Hide Illegal Aliens Before the DNC Convention Didn’t Go Well

Biden Regime Makes It Unmistakable: We’re On Hamas’ Side Now

New Jersey Taxpayers Spend $7 Billion Yearly on Illegals

VodkaPundit, Part Trois. ‘Trophy’ San Francisco Office Complex Goes on Life Support as This Tech Giant Leaves

Ignore the Shocking Number of Rapes Committed by ‘Newcomers’ or You’ll Be Punished, You Bigot

Marjorie Taylor Greene Makes Move to Oust Speaker Johnson, Gets Defeated

Laken Riley’s Accused Killer May Have Committed Another Crime the Same Day

VodkaPundit, Part Quatre. We’re Only Just Beginning to Understand the Extent of Biden’s Censorship Regime

California Considers Ending Most Self-Checkout Stations at Grocery Stores

Cool. Fani Willis Is on the Ropes

Biden’s Holocaust Remembrance Speech a Fine Work of Art But His Actions Leave Much to Be Desired

Finally: D.C. Police Move in and Clear Anti-Israel Protest Camp at GWU

Challenge Accepted: Biden Camp Announces He Will Debate Trump

Bachelor Order-of-Protection Hearing Reveals Bombshell in Owens v. Echard

Accuser Gives Lurid Details of Alleged Harassment, Assault by Then-Senator Biden

Biden’s National Guard Power Grab

An Entire New City Dedicated to Teaching and Spreading Radical Islam Is Being Built. What Could Go Wrong?

54 Years After Its Release, ‘Let It Be,’ the Beatles’ Last Movie, Is Finally Available for Home Viewing

Townhall Mothership

Schlichter. Let Them Destroy Each Other


Bulldozer FTW. Dutch Police Weren’t Messing Dispersing Pro-Hamas Supporters at the University of Amsterdam

Liberal Media Shocked to Learn Joe Biden Isn’t Doing Too Hot In the Polls

The Squad Has a Meltdown Over Pro-Terrorism Encampments Getting Dismantled

Pennsylvania Gun Control Bills Defeated in House

Cam&Co. Former DA Has a Warning for Gun-Owning Parents

Savannah Mayor Delusionally Defiant Over Gun Ordinance

Locus of Control: Why Identity Politics Makes the Left Miserable

Still True: The Hardest Exercise on Earth Is Pushing Back From the Table

AARP: Trump Winning Pennsylvania Decisively

Joe Biden’s Insane Interview With Erin Burnett Should Be the Final Straw for American Voters

Biden Gets Busted on Big Lie in Wisconsin With New, Ridiculous Tall Tale

UN Relief and Works Agency Staff Stealing, Reselling Humanitarian Aid Meant for Gazans

Bill Melugin Takes an Illegal Immigration Apologist to Task and it is Glorious

Flint Has Entered the Chat: Biden Promises Clean Water for All Americans, Gets FLOODED With Criticism

Daily Beast Calls Rep. Jamaal Bowman’s YouTube Channel a ‘Conspiracy Theorist’s Dream’


Become part of the PJ Media VIP party by subscribing here. Use promo code KRUISERMB to receive a WHOPPING 50% discount. Trust me, we’re having fun over here.

VodkaPundit, Part Cinq. FDA May Allow ‘Ecstacy’ to Treat PTSD, and Vets Should Be Ecstatic

V-E Day and Fighting for Freedom Against the New Nazis

Idaho Mom Describes How School Groomed Her Daughter to Be Trans

Trans Activists Overwhelm Utah’s Bathroom Tip Line


GOP Threatens Sanctions If International Criminal Court Indicts Netanyahu

Yes, Alvin Bragg’s Case Against Trump Is Falling Apart. But Will That Matter?

Biden’s Path to 270 Electoral College Votes Looks Increasingly Bleak

Around the Interwebz

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