The Morning Briefing: A Veritable Buffet of Conservative Delights

To devoted Morning Briefing readers hoping for Kruiser’s usual serving of Polish Name + Random Action + Equally Random and Ornate Object – Expected Outcome, I, too, feel the sting of disappointment at learning I’m filling in today. Kruiser is in New York City celebrating his daughter’s graduation, and we should all say a Hail Mary that he return to his desert hermitage relatively soon, lest he be swept away by The Big Apple’s current of bright lights and raw sewage into the abyss of comedy clubs and bad politics.

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“People really like it when guest authors make The Briefing their own.”
-Stephen Kruiser

Last week was Teacher Appreciation Week. Before I became a teacher, this annual observance was little more than a bonafide hassle: not only do I need to remember to pick up something special for my kids to give to Ms. Whoever, but *chokes on spit* there are HOW MANY teachers? And I have to get gifts for all of them?! I’m already cruising Craig’s List for a buyer for a kidney (not mine, don’t worry ((or ask))) to afford Bidenomics Groceries, but now I need to find another $150 for 10 gifts!

Maybe it’s just me who felt inconvenienced and pressured. After all, buying someone a gift for doing their job feels a bit unnatural. When I was a communication strategist for Texas statewide political campaigns, no one gave me a something extra for doing the work I was hired and paid to do. In fact, my bonus was getting to come back the next week to earn another paycheck.

Then I became a teacher.

My first experience on the receiving end of Teacher Appreciation Week was overwhelming. Flowers, balloons, drawings, cards, candy, water bottles, supplies, and even a few books filled the front seat of my car each day. I may not have to buy a cup of coffee until September thanks to all of the gift cards.

Do I deserve this deluge of generosity? I arrive at 7:30 to ensure I’m logistically ready to manage all of my classes, then greet my students. All day I teach literacy, grammar, spelling, and composition; I encourage, listen to, and model behavior for students; I discipline and correct 11, 12, and 13-year-olds for the same stupid stuff over and over until they learn; I identify and provide for food insecure students; I discreetly assist kids who cut themselves or make themselves puke in the bathroom; I craft bulletin boards that encourage reading and games to engage even the most stubborn kids; I talk to and text with parents about grades and conduct and expectations. In this light, no, I do not deserve gifts or recognition from anyone, even if half of that stuff isn’t in my job description or contract because it’s just what good teachers do.

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I don’t go above and beyond my official duties for accolades or acknowledgement. I do it because I love it.

We should all be fortunate enough to do what we love every day. Imagine if we did. How wonderful would it be to pour our time and energy into others while simultaneously being filled! If you’ve had a teacher like that — if you’ve encountered any professional like that, actually — you will never forget them. Mrs. Belin made me fall in love with learning in first grade. Mr. Builta showed me how to appreciate the beauty of Shakespeare’s sonnets in seventh grade. Ruvi, the TA at Baylor University transformed the Treaty of Versailles from a lame test question into a catalyzing consequential cascade, unintentionally determining my entire course of study. 

I’ll bet you’re recalling a teacher or two who influenced your life. If they’re still alive, track them down and thank them for following their passion. If your kids have good teachers, you’ll know it; thank them, not because they need it, but because they are part of shaping your child into the adult you want them to be. If your kids have one of the colorful wackos whose preferred pronouns are Victim/Aggressor/Toilet Flower, send us an email and we’ll find ways to rescue your child. 

Doctors, nurses, plumbers, electricians, bankers, agents, bosses, teachers, artists, anyone who contributes to, protects, or inspires your dreams deserves gratitude. Joe Biden’s economy won’t make giving a gift an option for everyone, but he can’t stop you from sending an email or a note, leaving a positive review online, or looking them in the while while saying a genuine “Thank you for…”

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You know who else works hard? Our contributors! You can thank them for educating, entertaining, and enlightening you by purchasing a subscription! I mean, get yourself an all-access pass, support our people’s work, and stick it to the leftist lot by supporting the biggest digital conservative footprint this side of Fox News. Equally effective, forward The Briefing and all of your go-to articles to your friends. 

Now, for the parade of links!

Which is more colorful, the aurora borealis phenomenon or LGBTQIA-E-I-E-I-O *waves vaguely* thing?

Campus Chaos: Should institutions send repair bills to students and their parents?

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Doubling down on antisemitism.

I’m sorry, what?

In totally unrelated news…

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